This week’s video is about sexual desire, libido and how our ED can affect it. I had to do some research on this because I had my assumptions, but I wanted to know what the data states. Just so you know, 45-50% of those suffering with AN (anorexia nervosa) and 35-40% of those suffering from bulimia nervosa, EDNOS, and binge eating disorder struggle with the loss of or decrease in sexual desire. So you are not alone in your feelings about this. Infertility is a very common side effect of having an ED and because our bodies do not have to reproduce, it can get rid of our ability to in order to keep other things functioning properly.
Another issue that I want to address is romantic relationships, and how they can suffer from our ED as well. One of the most important things in any relationship is communication. If we do not talk to our friends or loved ones honestly about what is going on with us, than we really cannot have a healthy and stable relationship. I know that it is really hard and can be completely overwhelming, but just work on sharing a little bit of information at a time. Now, we are only doing this if we like the person, think they are worth getting to know, and perhaps trustworthy. Right? So just start little by little and don’t feel pressure to dump all of that information on them at once, but do be honest. For example, if something comes up and all you can think about is how that interferes with your appointment with your dietitian, just tell them you have an appointment that day and if you want, tell them that you see a dietitian. Once you have reached your comfort level for sharing, just say that you don’t feel like talking about it now, but you can talk more later. Leave it at that. But let’s all work together to be more honest and open about what is going and so that we can have people in our lives who we can lean on when we need that extra support. Also, don’t forget to check out my free workbook available on KatiMorton.com and let’s keep working together towards a Healthy Mind and a Healthy Body!!
Need Energy?? Try Breath of Fire! - Breathing Exercise #2 (by KatiMorton)
This video is another breathing technique. I know that usually I give you relaxing ones, but I realized that many of us actually need energy during our day and so I thought this one could be helpful too! This technique is one that is used in yoga a lot and is called the breath of fire. I know it sounds really intense, but I promise it is not too hard:)
The reason that this works to invigorate our bodies is because we are pushing out all of our stale air and bringing in fresh oxygen. This can help our bodies push our any old and less oxygenated blood that could have accumulated and replacing it with oxygen rich blood. Now this technique is not something that cannot be done when others are around because it is a bit noisy, but it does only take 15 seconds. So let’s step away for a bit and give it a try!!
This week’s video talks about men and eating disorders. I know that many of us may think that an ED is an ED whether you are a man or a woman, and you are right. However, after doing some research, I found that being a man with an ED can be increasingly difficult. First of all, I would like to address the stigma that any man who has an ED is gay. I do know that the research shows the prevalence of EDs in the gay community is on the rise, but one has nothing to do with another. Our sexual preference has nothing to do with our mental health, period. Secondly, because 90% of EDs occur in women, it goes undiagnosed in men for long periods of time. We can go to the doctor hoping to get help and instead of thinking about what our blood work or complaints could really mean, they assume it is something else. The main reason for this is because men use their EDs to look like various body types. Some men want to be thin, maybe like Mick Jagger and others want to be bulked up like an Arnold Schwarzenegger. Others want to be somewhere in the middle like David Beckham. Since they may not show the same symptoms or even talk about their desire to look one certain way, many therapists and doctors over look it, and miss the issue entirely.
I am hoping that by creating this video we can begin talking about EDs with regard to all people who suffer. Everyone is different. Everyone’s ED is different and everyone deserves to get the help they need. So let’s talk about it! Let’s break through the stigma! EDs happen to all types of people, and we can all recover:) So let’s keep working together as we work towards a healthy mind and a healthy body.
Today’s video is about anger. I know you are probably wondering why I chose to do a video about anger and the reason is because many of us run from this emotion. I know that for many of the clients that I have worked with over the years, they never stand up for themselves or feel able to confront someone who has hurt them. They for some reason feel that they are not worthy or do not deserve to be anger or express that anger to the person who caused it. They even turn their anger in on themselves believing that they do not have a right to feel the way that they do. It is because of this uncomfortability with even the slightest feelings of anger that I am addressing it today.
The first thing I want you to notice is how anger feels in your body. You know your body. Your throat, your hands, your jaw etc. Think about how it feels when you get angry. What do you do to suppress it? When do you know that you cannot suppress it and you are going to explode? What signs does your body give you? Think about all of these things and go grab some craft supplies. You won’t need much, just some paper, an old magazine, markers and/or crayons.
I first want you to color that entire paper red. Let the feelings of anger pulse through your hands as you color. See what it feels like to harness the feeling and use it to do something constructive. Once the entire sheet is colored red, I want you to fill it with words and cut out pieces of things that make you angry. The reason this is a great way to start exploring this emotion is because you do not have to talk to anyone about it. You just get to see what it feels like to be angry and to exert that feeling through constructive motion.
Another way to begin experiencing anger on a more healthy level is to kick a ball, or throw a ball into a cement wall. That can help you express your anger through another motion. You have to kind of figure out what works best for you, but just make sure that you are not damaging anything by doing any of these activities.
You can also listen to angry music while doing this. Put your head phones on and really allow yourself to feel anger and notice how your body responds. If you cannot get outside, maybe scream into a pillow or throw a stuffed animal around. That can give you the same satisfaction as kicking a ball in a much more inside friendly way.
The last option is to write it out. Maybe write some mean letters, that you never send, to people who have angered or hurt you. Be honest! Be mean! Express what you are truly feeling without any worry that someone may read it later. This can really help you begin to see why you are in fact angry and in a way justify the emotion for you that you have had so much trouble trusting.
I hope that at least one of these tips helps you healthfully express your anger and allow you to begin turning that anger outward appropriately instead of inward and harming ourselves more. Leave your comments below and do not forget to subscribe to my channel so that when I post my next video you are notified. So let’s continue to work together as we move towards a healthy mind and a healthy body.
Suicide Prevention - Healthy Mind, Healthy Body (by KatiMorton)
This week’s video touches on something that can be very scary to talk about, suicide. The reason that I wanted to take the time to talk about this topic is because I have heard from many of you that either you have had suicidal thoughts or you know someone who is. Due to the way I was trained I believe that the worst thing I could do would be to not talk about it. It is my belief that the more we talk about things, the less power it has over us. That is why I created my site and these videos; to increase the amount of positive “talk” our there, because our ED’s thrive in isolation and silence.
First I want to address what to do if you yourself are having thoughts of suicide. Obviously, based on what I just said, the first thing to do would be to contact someone you trust. This could be a best friend, a therapist, a parent, whoever. Just make sure that they are supportive and loving and they have a great history of acting that way with you. You do not need to dump all of your thoughts and concerns right away, it is okay to just let them know you have been struggling and having a hard time motivating yourself to do anything to help. Or whatever it is you are feeling, but do not feel like you have to dump all of your suicidal thoughts on them at once. What we are working to create with this is a safe place to talk about your struggles and to get some support. You can also create videos and post them on my site or create your own youtube channel and post them there. Also, journaling can be a great tool to help us really think about what it going on and maybe get some insight into why we are feeling the way we are. If we can figure that out, we will be better armed to deal with the thoughts the next time around.
Secondly I want to discuss what to do if someone you know is having suicidal thoughts and they told you about it. Well first I would refer them to a hotline or a teen help line. These can differ depending on where you live, but I would just search for the ones in your area and have them written down somewhere so that you have them in a crisis. After giving them that information I would be supportive and caring, but be cautious of getting wrapped up in it. Just like we talked about last week, we need to protect ourselves and our recovery. You can still be supportive and loving, but you don’t want to get to so wrapped up in it that we ourselves begin to struggle. You can also let me know about it. I would be more than happy to help out. I will not post anything publically or anything, but I will do my best to contact them privately and offer some support and understanding.
Obviously there is a lot more to talk about when it comes to dealing with suicide and suicidal thoughts, but these are just some helpful tips so that if something happens, we have a plan and can work together to continue building this community working towards a healthy mind and a healthy body.